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| America's Best Dance Crew Season 3 is offically the best season. The team I wanted to win from the very beginning has finally won. Quest Crew. They are seriously the most.. adorable people ever. They have the greatest personalities ever. I love them. Honestly. I doubt anyone will ever compare to them. Aside from their amazing personalities, they had.. ridiculous tricks. Everytime they came up with something new and creative. I have no idea how they do it. Considering how it's kind of late, I think I should finish my homework and go to bed. But really, today is one of the greatest days. I think my life is complete. (:
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| My new year's resolutions epically failed just about.. the second day into the new year. So I tried again during Chinese New Year.. but once again, epic fail. I don't know.. I guess I can't be nice because then I can't be truly honest. Today I was a major jerk to two people. First I told off this little freshman girl who really should stay in the freshmen cafe and not come to the senior cafe with upper classmen and be annoying -- really annoying. Then I asked Jean's now ex-boyfriend if he's gay, because I've hated him all along. He was never nice to me and I only beared with him because Jean liked him. Thank gosh that period of fake-ness is over. Butttt. I just.. really don't know how to be nice.. like.. if someone pisses me off I'm gonna tell them off, which isn't very nice, now is it? I don't even know. I don't even know how ppl stand me! Seriously.. I'd hate me if I weren't me. Actually, I think I already hate me. Oh.. and I have this really bad over-eating problem. How do I stop? How do I gain self-control?? Not just over eating.. over watching too much TV too.. oh, Life... | | |
| Goodbye 2008. Another year has come and soon will be gone. I feel the same. I have not altered my life. I am still the same. Mean. Unfocused. Unmotivated. But I think my parents' words plus all these dramas about trust and honesty and appreciating life and people obsessed with succeeding are starting to get to me. I feel that I should really try. People try so hard that they go crazy, but I'm the opposite. I do not try at all and only complain about boredom. Sometimes I feel like 2008 was a waste. But if I think a little more... it really was not. The end of sophomore year was like every other school year I've wasted, but the summer was good. I finished my summer homework with many days to spare and I went to CTY in California and actually tried to learn. The Olympics were definitely something special, and I'm glad I was able to watch it. That's not to say there aren't a lot of things I regret. I could have been nicer to friends. I could have studied harder. I could have said how I feel to the person. I could have, I could have, I could have. So along with the nice memories I have of 2008, I also carry away many regrets. I can. I can focus, I just never actually try. I can study, I just never actually find a will to. I can be nice, I just never actually want to. I can practice piano, I just never actually feel like it. These should all be things I should change about myself. Thus my new years' rsolutions are as follows: 1. FOCUS
2. Be nice. I pray for my success. | | |
| Oy vey. So I've been doing a lot of thinking.. when I should be doing.. hmwk and productive things. I don't know. Life's weird. I can't seem to concentrate.. ever. I'm always tired, even when I get enough sleep. Everything seems boring. Things just pass by me. I think I've lost my zest for life.. That's terrible! I've been doing wayyy too much thinking about college. Wayyy too much thinking about how I should be doing something, but I don't. I find my mind.. drifting off, all the time. I can never concentrate on the task at hand, and I never am truly enthusiastic about what I am doing. Sometimes I'm angry, sometimes I'm happy. Overall, I'm stressed. I wish with all my heart's desire to be able to go to Stanford, but quite honestly, I doubt that I have the capacity or the passion to go there.. I wish I did, but I doubt it. But I really, really, really, really want to go. I also really would like the most beautiful laptop I have ever seen, because Steve Jobs is seriously.. my hero. Everything that man makes is.. beautiful. Apple♥ 
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